UnderRated

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Same Female, Different Mentality and just a SPLASH of Maturity! 

In one photo I see a girl that is bursting with potential without so much as a single clue on how to apply what’s on the inside to the real world. In the other photo a woman who has recognized that her life is the LESSON, for herself and others!

The road to get there? ROCKY!

A young impressionable girl that didn’t know any better until she tripped and scrapped her knees a few times. As a Mommy, Life Coach and Mentor, I am clear that these are things that young girls should be equipped with early on!

  • {Self-worth} – As young women we need to hear that we are important. Value is something that human beings struggle with daily. Why am I here? That young girl in the picture needed to hear that she was important, smart, irreplaceable and valuable! People need to feel like they have a place in this massive world! I had to fight to teach myself that very important lesson! I remember hearing that God loved me exactly how I was and fell apart in my sisters attic. ME? With all of my mistakes? It took me many years after that to realize my true value. It was never and will never be external. My values have everything to do with things such as my integrity and my character. I like who I see in the mirror, I hold her accountable and work to be a better person.

 

  • {The Requirements}– There is NO POINT to know what you are worth, however, surround yourself with people that don’t value who you are as a person. I am a very sensitive person. Lord, knows I don’t mean emotionally (someone is somewhere rolling their eyes at this statement hahah grow up!) When I say sensitive I mean, what I take in visually, what I hear, the energy I feel, the intentions of people that are around me, affect me. Like A Lot! The older I get the more I understand that not everyone deserves to share my space. I not only deserve to be treated with respect, I also only allow a certain type of person with certain characteristics and intentions to share in my space. CRITICAL! Just a long winded version of saying “Not everyone is FOR you.”

 

  • {Truth and Trust}– One of my saying is “The world taught me that I can’t trust people.” While that is my reality, because there were points in my life where I was in need and felt like I was totally alone. There were people in my life that hurt and disappointed me. Through my hardship and through healing brokenness, allowing people “IN” was pivotal. Yes, everyone is capable or hurting you but NO not everyone will! First, know that you are amazing enough to share your heart and who you are with others. I use to be way too afraid to show others, Vanessa. Second, know that people also deserve the benefit of the doubt. Living a life of mistrust is so isolating! You keep yourself from getting hurt BUT you also stop the possibility of fulfilling relationships. Ones where you can say I’m hurt, I’m proud of myself, I’m scared!

 

  • {Fear is the thief of JOY}– My love, SMILE! Live vibrantly, LAUGH LOUD! My best moment was when I learned that “a bad day is JUST one bad day!” Live fearlessly! Enjoy every ounce of the sweet moments and stay strong during the storms! They do not last FOREVER! We tend to get so wrapped up in life’s valleys, fear and worry that we miss the blessing, looking us right in the face! If 31 year old Vanessa could look 20 year old Vanessa in the face I’d tell her behind a joke, lift her face up, take her hand from in front of her mouth and ask if it was SOOOOO painful to smile.

 

  • {LEARN from the STUMBLES}– Life is consistently filled with trials, tribulations and lessons. One beautiful lesson is, I AM NOT MY MISTAKES! I would once tack my mistakes onto why I had no value and now I use it as motivation to be a better Ness tomorrow. I focus on it long enough to fully understand the lesson and push pass it. Remembering that I’M JUST HUMAN! You are just human sweetheart! Value the lesson, discard the negative self talk!

 

You survive! You become better! Your journey may be bumpy but the outcome is rewarding! In the meantime, learn the lessons, protect your heart, LIVE and remember you are worth all of the fight that you have right down inside of you!

Love,

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“For me, transparency is the difference between bondage and freedom.”

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